Emotional Maturity

Today's post is inspired by a "mental toughness" seminar that I've been following.

www.fatloser.com

I saw the author on our local news a few weeks ago, he written numerous self-help and mental toughness books and audio series.  His current book is "Die Fat or Get Tough"...I'm awaiting my copy.  His goal in this particular seminar is to help people overcome their emotional immaturity to lose weight.  He wants you "mental tough" so you can get rid of that little voice in your head that talks bad to you, allows you to make poor choices and to give excuses for being fat.  He makes alot of sense.  His 21 day seminar at Fat Loser is free if you want to check it out.

I was behind a few days, so I watched 4 days worth this morning and there was a common theme..."Emotional Maturity;" how we are emotional creatures that can talk ourselves into anything.  My failure to lose weight and stick to a diet is because I lack emotional maturity.  This concept really hit home for me.  I've always been heavy, excuse me, I mean FAT...you can see in pictures from the ages 3-5 how I got fat.  My families eating habits were atrocious, alot of fast food, pizza, no veggies, all starches/carbs.  My mom worked and went to school from the time I was 3-9, we were always on the go.  It was those formative years that I learned nothing about nutrition and eating healthy and I still think that way.  I know better!  I've lost and gained weight many times and the foundation should be healthy/clean eating, which I ignore for "convenience" sake.  I'm tired, I'm to busy, we don't have XYZ...I know better, I'm the adult, yet I allow myself to be lazy and stop by a drive thru. 

Yesterday was a perfect example, I ate well at work, but I got more and more physically tired as the day went on.  I munched on a snack that my partner had brought in (counted the points!) but when I was leaving work, I "needed" some caffeine, so I hit up McDonald's...and rather than just a glass of Diet Coke, I ended up w/ a McDouble value meal.  It's only $3, I'm hungrrrrrrrry, I said to myself.  Did the grease and fat filled sandwich and fries make me feel more energized?  Nope, just the opposite, even though I worked out immediately after, I was still tired and sluggish.  I also told myself I'd change my WW tracker from the Chicken Spaghetti I "planned" to eat for dinner later to the McDonald's.  I told myself I'd have a small salad for dinner...did I?  Well, you probably guessed that I didn't.  I ate my serving of Chicken Spaghetti on top of the McDonald's, which put myself waaaaay over my points for the day, which I did track.  Did I feel less tired or sluggish?  Nope, and I felt guilty on top of it.

The videos today really hit home.  He said things like "behavior follows belief"...well, I believed the  value meal wouldn't sabotage my diet, so I got it.  I was hungrrrrry, so I needed to eat; didn't work out so well for me.  Also, "motivate with logic, not emotion."  My need to lose weight is for physical health, but it's for my mental health also.  I get extremely upset with myself when I make poor choices and when I slack off on working out.  I need to look at my choices logically and teach myself how to change my behavior w/o the underlying emotion. 

I need to truly believe in self talk and mental toughness.  He mentioned an SNL skit w/ Stuart Smiley.  "I'm good enough, I'm smart enough and darn it, people like me!" While I chuckled, I immediately thought "I'm good enough, smart enough and I CAN lose this weight!"  He gave a couple of ideas to help and scripts to repeat...so here it goes. 

1.  As an emotional creature, I can talk myself into anything. 
I can take those negative emotions and talk to myself in a positive and logical way to get my eating under control.
2.  I have the ability to handle anything that life throws at me...
I really do.  I can handle anything!
3.  The universe is conspiring to help me get what I want...
I don't necessarily believe this one, but if I say it daily, maybe I can believe it!
4.  I can achieve anything I focus on.
Focus and the mental toughness to struggle on and change my habits and way of thinking!